Opening

Last week was a dickens of a week.  Three major things went wrong, and I went reeling from the blows, one following another.  But despite the catstrophes, and a couple of days in which I sank about as low as I go, feeling like some droopy flowers noticed the other day after a particularly cold night, I find myself opening to the sun again. 

The re-emergence began yesterday morning after my meditation, and then a visit from a friend.  We had lunch at one of my favorite spots and talked about everything EXCEPT the problems.  Well, that may be an exaggeration, but I found myself recovering from that dive into the depths.  My friend brought a bit of sunshine along with her, and offered me a helping hand. 

The temptation after bad news, for many of us, is to isolate when feeling so badly; to shut out the sun, quite literally.  Some of us barricade ourselves in the house, watching melancholy movies, eating badly, feeling terrible!   Some folks turn to drinking or taking drugs.  Some go temporarily insane.  And many want to blame others for the pain.

The good news is that it doesn't have to stay that way, even if it's the way one has always coped.  When hard things happen if we reach out for the help we need; trying to find the thing that is going to lift us up, rather than get tangled up in the self hate, in which some of us have spent so much energy and time, love begins to trickle back into our lives.  Taking responsibility for our own lives is part of the answer.  The other reality, is that as we immersed our lives in community (and for me this is definitely the liturgical life of the church), help comes.  As we open up our hearts, it is amazing the gifts which appear in the form of friends:  both old and new; practical help; happiness about the things which really matter; solutions to catastrophes that don't need to be the end of life as we know it...and are certainly not the measure of one's worth as a person.

Well, it is amazing how "busy-ness" comes to a quick halt without easy transportation.  So I'm diving into creativity to fill the time.  And since I'm trying to organize an Easter brunch, I'm thinking that I will make some cinnamon rolls to freeze...or muffins...or scones?  Oh dear, did I remember to buy butter?  I did.  So I'm set.  And I'm set up to make some cards.  And I'm preparing for a house concert in April.  And I'm working on some new poems.  And a friend and I have been talking about writing a musical together...and that's sitting on the back burner, awaiting attention.  Not to mention that Joy needs a good walk today, and the house could use some cleaning.

There's enough to keep me busy for a while. 

Hope your day is full of sunshine, and that your heart is wide open to it!

C.