The Evil Eye? or Jealousy, a Tough Love Friend?

Yesterday I was at a bible study about the parable where the landowner pays one group of laborers a penny for the day, working from the beginning of the day, and a second group, working from noon the same wage and then hiring more workers at the end of the day, for the same wage that the laborers who spent the entire day in the scorching heat received. It was an interesting discussion.

In the King James version, there was a phrase that the priest who was leading the discussion brought out several times: the eye of evil. It was in reference to the laborer's jealousy of the last laborers. I re-watched Fiddler on the Roof recently, and Golda tells her daughters not to tempt the evil eye, by bragging too much.

 

This particular parable really isn't about what it seems to be about.  But I've been looking at some issues of jealousy and envy in my own life and the destruction it can cause when we are not honest with ourselves. 

Jealousy can indeed be the eye of evil. Coveting, envy, becoming bitter when someone is more fortunate than ourselves, or maybe not even more fortunate, but perhaps more gifted in special ways, can cause us to act in ways that are destructive. Sometimes in ways that we don't even see ourselves. We become bitter, and then from that bitterness flows all kinds of things that can cause great harm to the people around us, especially the one in particular of whom we are envious.

If you look at the reasons behind spouse abuse, you will always find jealousy in the mix. If you look at the reasons for murder, you will most often find jealousy, envy and greed at the root. If you look at the broken relationships throughout our lives, jealousy and envy can often be found in the reasons that things go awry. Siblings will often having terrible disagreements about certain items in a family and which goes to whom when the parents die.

Jealousy often happens when someone is a gifted writer, musician or artist and receives fame. Julia Cameron in her book The Artist's Way calls jealousy a tough love friend when working on creative recovery. I have found that to be very true. When I am feeling critical and bitter about someone else's success, it is often because I have set my own creative force aside for what I term "practical reasons." Take a look at some of your own feelings of envy. Of whom are you envious? What makes your stomach tie up in knots with jealousy? Could it be that perhaps you simply need to allow yourself the luxury of pursuing the things you love?

There have been people in my life, even myself at times, who have a need to be center stage, the center of attention all the time. When we lose the lime light to someone else, even for a little while, something rises up and that old eye of evil comes to bear. Be cautious! Let's look at our jealousies honestly and even more powerfully, listen to what they have to say. It is important for our well being. When we brush them aside, or refuse to examine those shadowy feelings, they come out sideways wreaking all manner of havoc.

There was a wonderful friendship in my life many years ago that was destroyed by jealousy. The friend would have said the issue was completely my envy of her gifts. There were many complex issues at work, and that very gifted friend had been terribly hurt by people who had been jealous of those special gifts. I became a convenient scapegoat, however I was not innocent in the story either. I own that, and it saddens me to remember a friendship so full of possibility and creativity, ended because we couldn't address those issues honestly within ourselves.

Our jealousies can come out in all sorts of ways.  Sometimes we can patronize, stereotype or discredit the person of whom we are envious.  Sometimes we spread rumors about them, gossiping and focusing on their weaknesses..  It is interesting behavior.  And it can cause great harm...especially when one holds power.  Channeling and using that power to build others up is our calling.  It is always to make room for others and the special gifts they bring.  And when we ourselves have gifts to bring, it is important that we make room for those to shine as well.  After all, we were created to hold God's glory.  Let's do our best not to leave stains on each other because of the evil eye!  Let's listen to what our envy has to say and give ourselves the gift of allowing ourselves to be creative, to have abundance flow through our lives, and most of all, to remember that we are deeply and wonderfully loved.

Eternal and Loving God, give us eyes to see the truth about ourselves. Give us ears to hear when our own insecurities are getting in the way of your Spirit's flow. Help us to listen and to hear the whispers of our own hearts, our own longings and desires. And help us to know that the things for which we most yearn, have a place in your plan. You delight in giving us the desires of our hearts. You take great joy in seeing us shine with your glory. Give us a spirit of humility which can make room for other people and their wonderful gifts, even as we open ourselves to the source of all creativity and allow you to flow through us. May it be so!